A big, comfey queen-sized bed with a twin mattress on the floor alongside works out just fine for all of us.
Love having my girl back in our room and I think she is much more secure and settled, too.
Co-sleeping, but not in the same bed. As with most things "parent," it's about what is right for your family.
There is no "one size fits all" model.
Today, a co-worker told me she is scheduled for her second child's birth, a c-section. She said something that really hit home with me. "I could have tried to go VBAC, but what for? So I can do this? (And she reached back and made the patting herself on the shoulder motion) and then said, "Yeah. Who cares?"
I love her for that. Natural birth vs. C-section. Breast vs. Bottle? Who cares? Really and truly.
Anyone who gets caught up in that or thinks they deserve a pat on the back for their individual choice
is missing the point. No one wants their baby "ripped from their womb," (long story about that one.) As my then MIL said to me, "The goal here is having a healthy baby."
My goal is always to have a healthy, strong, secure daughter...one who knows she is loved and cared for and has a positive sense of herself as a result. If co-sleeping gives her more peace of mind, then co-sleeping it is. We're happy.